'That Guy'

Let me start off by saying that I have only ever seen the pilot episode for the show "The Office". Besides that, all the knowledge I have of this fine show is what I get from my brothers talking about it. From that episode I remember a character whose name I forgot, really, it's not important, but what is important is the fact that he perfectly portrayed 'that guy'. You know who I am talking about, the 38 year old bachelor who probably lives with his parents, believes he possesses this ultimate power over all his coworkers, sucks up to the hardbutts in the office, spies on his coworkers, tattles on his coworkers, is usually very mean, or can be, but still puts his 'face' on when talking in front of you. Yeah, that type. Well, I met him today, not for the first time, for the first week I got the feeling that he was feeling me out, seeing how acted, looking for mistakes to hate or point out, but hey, he seemed like a nice guy, a good source for information, I mean heck, I am brand new over here. Today however, I got to meet the ugly side of him, of Steven Kiser. Here's the short version of the story...

I am poor right now, I don't fit into many clothes I have, and all I can do is wait. So for now, I have a pair of khakis that I wear everyday, I have some nice shirts, then I have my nice vans. Well today, I wore the velcros, again, they are nice, clean, not ripped, and most importantly, they're black. I thought they would blend in. Well what happens is this, my Manpower boss, Chris, who by the way just got surgery on her eyes, so what that means is really, she cant see very well, anyway she comes over to our little pod and nothing is happening so I was told that I could read my book. So I'm just chilling with everyone else reading my book, enjoying the comfort of my Vans and she walks straight up to me and in a very strange and uncomfortable manner tells me that I cannot wear tennis shoes (again, these are second only to the other dress shoes I have) and that I cannot read a book at my desk. First off, she is so blind that I do not know how she saw what I was wearing, I had them tucked under the desk away from her, (first sign of suspicious activities going on), then she was the one who said I can read books!!!

So what happened you ask? Well, Steven did, or so we think, because after awhile goes by after this incident, one of the guys in the pod sees him come by and peak his head over the cubicles, then he turns around and goes back to his desk. Checking up on us to report to Chris? Maybe? Very likely.

In any case the stories now get told of things that Steven has done in the past, ie, he has this nervous tick where he flicks his pants near his butt, then adjusts himself, he will do this, while teaching the 5 of us, and we are all crowded in the cubicle trying to see the screen, he will literally flick his weiner at some of the girls, its gross, and obviously uncomfortable, we (the 5) don't like it, we don't like him, he is mean and blows up at this girl who is trying to learn for no reason.

After thinking about this for a while I decide to ask my guru brother Derrick a thing or two about the show, "The Office." He tells me that there is a guy like this in the show, he is Dwight Schrute, and here is Dwight...
notice the big aviator-type glasses, the crazy look on his face, etc. etc.
Well here is my Dwight Schrute.... Steven Kiser -

notive the big aviator-type glasses? The Crazy look on his face, etc. etc.?

Now alot of people in this situation would say "I am going to H, E, double hockeystick, for saying this", but really, if you were to meet him and see what he does and how he acts, he would be the person you would really want to avoid at all cost. And I think, unfortunatly, I'm going to have to start doing just that.

THE OFFICE IS MORE REALISTIC THAN YOU KNOW.